In the best interests of adopted children, it’s important for prospective adoptive parents to thoroughly assess their readiness to adopt, and to consider the type of adoption that best matches their values, priorities, and budget.

The following questions are not meant to be exhaustive, and they should not be answered too hastily in a day or a week. They are designed to get you started on a responsible and fulfilling adoption journey.

Note: If you’re planning to adopt with a partner or spouse, we suggest that you consider these questions by yourselves first, then discuss them. As you begin your discussions, you may change the first person singular (“I”) in each question to the first person plural (“we”).

Deciding to Adopt

1. Have I thoroughly explored any options I may have for producing a child who is biologically related to me?  Am I ready to approach adoption positively, not as “second best”?

2. Can I let go of parenting a child who looks like me, shares my genetic predispositions and those of my family of origin?  Am I ready to appreciate his or her differences?

3. Is the parenting experience more important to me than the pregnancy/birth experience?

4. If I am considering adoption with a partner or spouse, are my partner and I in agreement about the decision to adopt?  If not, what do we need to do to reach agreement?
   
   

Private Domestic Adoption

1. If I’m considering private domestic adoption, what more do I need to learn or explore so that I can feel good about pursuing it?

2. How do I feel about being chosen by a pregnant woman who’s making an adoption plan for her child, and how do I feel about the possibility of an open or semi-open adoption?

3. Am I certain I have the energy and stamina to parent a newborn child?

4. What ethnicities, health issues, and birthfamily situations will I handle most effectively as a parent?
   
   

Foster Adoption-Domestic Waiting Children

1. If I’m considering adopting a child from the U.S. child welfare system, what more do I need to learn so that I feel good about pursuing this option?

2. How do I feel about raising a child whose birthparents’ rights have been terminated due to abuse or neglect?  Am I prepared no matter what to honor the important role the birthparents had or have in the child’s life?

3. Am I prepared to go through extensive training, and to be licensed as a foster parent with the goal of adopting a child to whom I’ll first foster?

4. What ages, ethnicities, health issues, and birthfamily situations am I comfortable with?
   
   

International Adoption

1. If I’m considering international adoption, what more do I need to learn so that I feel good about pursuing it?

2. Am I prepared to travel to another country, learn about and appreciate the culture and heritage of a child from that country?  What countries interest me?

3. Am I certain I want to parent a child about whose medical history and birthfamily I might obtain little, if any, information?

4. What ages, ethnicities, health issues, and birthfamily situations am I comfortable with? 

Other Questions and Issues
What other questions and issues do I need to resolve before adopting a child?